On I went, out of the wood, passing the man leading without knowing I was going to do so. Flip-flap, flip-flap, jog-trot, jog-trot, curnchslap-crunchslap, across the middle of a broad field again, rhythmically running in my greyhound effortless fashion, knowing I had won the race though it wasn't half over, won it if I wanted it, could go on for ten or fifteen or twenty miles if I had to and drop dead at the finish of it, which would be the same, in the end, as living an honest life like the governor wanted me to. -Alan Sillitoe, "Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner"

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Things I Do Not Like, July edition

Asics Chafe Free Endurance

Why don't I like it? Because it didn't work. I had a small tube in my handheld water bottle pouch and I tried to use it during a long run a few weeks ago. It seemed to work for about half an hour each time I applied - I would call it a failure, basically. SO, it's back to Body Glide. Except - what's that about Body Glide?

ENDURANCE MY ASS


Body Glide... for her.

Oh, yes, that. Why don't I like it? Because it's pink so I know it's for me since I'm a girl! But it's the same product, only more expensive because... the pink dye used in the plastic cap is pricey or something? Or maybe they charge more because they can. (Just like women's disposable razors are obscenely more expensive than men's.)

I'M A GIRL SO I LOOOOOOOVE PINK AND I'LL PAY HOWEVER MUCH YOU SAY IF IT'S PINK!

1.3 oz of Body Glide on Amazon: $8
.8 oz of Body Glide for her on Amazon: $7

Gu Brew Tablets

Oh, man oh man, how gross. I threw a tablet in my water bottle as I was heading out the door on Tuesday. It was hot, I was doing hill repeats, and I needed water with me. But this stuff - it was so gross. Sort of like Tang mixed with Crystal Light with a nasty aftertaste you couldn't shake.

To be fair, I have two tubes of this and I haven't thrown them away yet. It's mildly palatable as a post-run drink, so I'll keep it around. (Unlike Nathan Catalyst, which I tried and then promptly threw away.)

GROSS. GROSS.


Bikram Yoga

I feel like I'm supposed to like bikram because everyone does it. But you know what? I don't like it. I don't like the focus on pushing yourself further and harder into the poses, I don't like the hot room, and I don't like the fact that every class is always the exact same poses.

I have an unlimited pass to a local studio courtesy of Groupon, and I'll use it through July. But after that, I'm not sure that I'll be back to bikram for a while. And I think that maybe that's okay.

THIS IS BASICALLY ME, BUT I'M SKINNIER AND SWEATIER.

6 comments:

  1. Oh my god, that Bodyglide racket infuriates me. Less product for more money? BUT IT'S PINK!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I actually refuse to buy the girl's version of Bodyglide because of the pink. Yup. Then again, the Asics stuff kind of works for me. As long as I apply it and then let it dry, I'm fine. Even on a 31 miler (yikes...). But it does leave weird white marks all over your upper thighs...disturbing. Enough said.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yes. The pink INFURIATES me. SO irritating, on every level. We're just supposed to be so blinded by the pink that we don't consider the price! I mean, girls can't do math, anyway, so what does it matter?

    I'm wondering if I should give the Asics another try, applying it *before* I run instead of during. Hm...

    ReplyDelete
  4. I refuse to buy Body Glide for Her.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Okay, you should know I'm catching up on posts, and although I wasn't planning on going on a weird commenting spree, I'm going to have to and you only have yourself to blame.

    Body Glide for Her is totally a racket, and I actually had a long talk with a Body Glide rep about it at the JR running expo in April, who was really up front about the fact that they found that women were generally embarrassed or something to buy body glide because, you know, women only chafe if they're *fat*, so clearly buying body glide is like admitting to everyone how disgusting and fat you really are (um, yes, this is a an issue for me, did you pick up on that?)--so by making it pink and small, they've essentially created a product that women are no longer embarrassed to buy. It's no different from regular body glide, it's just smaller. It's really a sad commentary on, well, just about everything involving women, sports, and marketing.

    Bikram yoga: I agree. And for some reason that didn't stop me from buying a groupon to a studio near my office, which I now have to use. Why I did it, I don't know.

    I think GU must take pride in making things taste horrible. But I will still buy their chocolate outrage gels because they are pretty much the only gels I have ever found remotely palatable.

    And now if you could stop posting things that I so strongly agree with that I have no choice but to leave long-winded comments, I'd appreciate it.

    ReplyDelete
  6. dude. i love yoga and HATE HATE HATE bikram. join the haters club.

    ReplyDelete